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A gentlemanly approach

The author of this book, Wayne “Juggler” Elise, was one of the first to teach a “gentlemanly” pick up approach, back in the days where virtually all seduction advice was about alpha male projection, negs and other tricks.

By gentlemanly approach, I do not mean the lame, common way of the “nice guy”; Juggler simply recommends a warm, genuine, friendly vibe as the first step. “The greatest Pick Up Artist is the one who enjoys himself the most”, he says, and much of his teaching are designed to get you there.

This fits with his personality – a former comedian, Juggler is not a muscle-bound alpha male, but an ordinary guy with extraordinary results. The book itself is written in a very entertaining way, and you get a glimpse into his style just by reading it. The book is just full of personality, which is a nice change from many dry, purely technical pick up manuals.

One downside is that he does not really teach you how to be funny. There are many example of hilarious conversations and funny one-liners, but no tips on how to become witty enough to come up with your own.

Injecting fun

Juggler does suggests you take improvisation classes, and much of his style is based on that – fun, improvised lines that seems to come straight out of a stand-up comedy show. He is one of the best I’ve seen at injecting surprise and randomness into conversations. “Give up the need to be exact or correct in exchange for being bold”, he says, and later: “You don’t have to make any sense. You just have to strike the right chords.”

As far as banter goes, many tips are given here: use open-handed questions, hold a vacuum to force an answer, reward her when she earns it. Juggler also writes many examples of “bad” interactions, detailing the mistakes made and how to troubleshoot them.

His approach is mostly indirect – take in the situation and use a fun situational opener. Although there is a section on club game, Juggler is famous for his day game practice, and his non-threatening, just-having-fun vibe is especially well-suited for it.

Sexual intentions

As gentleman as he is, Juggler is no shy guy either – he is still a Pick Up Artist, eager to get results fast. He advocates making your sexual intentions clear right from the first interaction. Women find safe guys boring, he says – they appreciate a unapologetic guy who is not ashamed of what he wants.

When making a sexually charged comment, it is important to not go too far, and not try to overcome her objections. Instead, Juggler argues, agree with them: “One of the worst mistakes a guy can make is to destroy obstacles a woman bring up. These are her safety valves that enable her to flirt. Instead he should support them and use them to crank up the tension”. I thought this concept of “safety valves” was interesting and have not seen it mentioned anywhere else.

Recommended for its vibe and mindset

Overall, this book is a great read and I recommend it to newbies and intermediate guys. It may not be the most cutting edge or exhaustive book out there, but it contains a lot of excellent tips, and the mindset and vibe is a useful reminder: you do not necessarily need to slip into a fake, larger-than-life persona to get results.